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* *
* Let's eat the legs. *
* *
* You can't, the legs are poisonous. *
* *
* That's stupid, how can the legs be poisonous if the rest isn't? *
* *
* No one knows, but they are. *
* *
* I don't believe it. *
* *
* It's true. *
* *
* You're just saying that so I won't want them, then you'll eat them *
* after I've left. *
* *
* You're starting to sound paranoid. *
* *
* I notice that you aren't denying that you intend to eat the legs *
* after I leave. *
* *
* The legs are poisonous. I'm not ever going to eat them. *
* *
* Can you prove they're poisonous? *
* *
* Now? Tonight? *
* *
* Yes, now, tonight. *
* *
* No, I can't. You'll just have to trust me. The legs are poisonous. *
* *
* Trust you? Hah, that's rich. You must think I'm a prize idiot. *
* *
* I'm not sure about the prize part. *
* *
* Oh, very sneaky. Now you're trying to piss me off by insulting me. *
* You think I'll leave and you'll have the legs to yourself. *
* *
* Look, you can have the fucking legs. Go ahead, eat both of 'em. *
* After about twenty minutes you'll start feeling queasy. Then you'll *
* begin to vomit. You'll have trouble breathing. You'll start having *
* muscle spasms, then cramps. You'll go into convulsions. Then you'll *
* either drown on your own vomit or die of respiratory arrest. So go *
* right ahead, eat the fucking legs. *
* *
* Did you seriously think that a graphic description of death by *
* poisoning would convince me that the legs are poisonous? You must *
* really think I'm naive. *
* *
* Oh Christ, I give up. Fuck it. OK, you're right, the legs aren't really *
* poisonous, I just told you that so I'd have both of 'em for myself. Are *
* you happy now? *
* *
* I knew it, I just fucking knew it, you miserable slime. I can't believe *
* you'd try to screw me over that way. *
* *
* Sorry. *
* *
* I don't know why I put up with you. *
* *
* Me neither. *
* *
* God, you're such an asshole sometimes. *
* *
* I can't help it. I said I was sorry. *
* *
* Oh, alright, I forgive you. It's no big thing. Here, have one of the legs. *
* *
* No thanks, they're poisonous. *
* *
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* Robert Chansky, smq@ucscb.ucsc.edu, robertc@sco.com, *
* uunet!ucscc!ucscb!smq, uunet!ucscc!sco.com!robertc *
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